david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
