You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
