is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
