He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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