it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
