as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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