I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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