i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
