they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
