We won't sleep together?
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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