Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
