he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
