Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
We have so much sex to catch up on
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
