I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
honey bunches of taint.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
