I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize