HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
i think we sleep fucked last night...
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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