Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize