I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
