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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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