And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
