youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
