No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
