Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
pray to the hookup gods
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Randomize
