He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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