It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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