No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
