Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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