dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize