I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
