I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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