yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
