Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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