Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
