Where is the hickey?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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