My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
