People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize