Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
