Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I am mentally ready for anal.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize