i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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