This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
