You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
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