did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
