Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(925): View more from California

I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows

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(651): View more from Minnesota

He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day

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(256): View more from Alabama

Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.

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(+61): View more from Australia

I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.

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(224): View more from Illinois

She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.

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