youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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