There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
can u get pink eye on your cock?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
