Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
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