To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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