It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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