i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize