after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
But break dance skills will only take you so far
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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