Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
