i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
